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True prayer is an awareness of our helpless need and an acknowledgment of divine adequacy (Ray Stedman).


It goes against the grain to give an image of oneself that is anything less than perfect, and many Christians imagine that they will be rejected by others if they admit to any faults. But nothing could be more destructive to Christian koinonia (fellowship) than the common practice today of pretending not to have any problems (Ray Stedman).


True Christianity is to manifest genuinely Christ-like behavior by dependence on the working of the Spirit of God within, motivated by a love for the glory and honor of God (Ray Stedman).


The flesh is the old life, the natural life inherited from Adam, with its apparent resources of personality, of ancestry, of commitment, of dedication, and so forth. You can do all kinds of religious things in the flesh. The flesh can preach a sermon. The flesh can sing in the choir. The flesh can act as an usher. The flesh can lead people to Christ. Did you know that? The flesh can go out and be very zealous in its witnessing and amass a terribly impressive list of people won to Christ, scalps to hang on a belt. The flesh can do these things but it is absolutely nauseating in the eyes of God. It is merely religious activity. There is nothing wrong with what is being done, but what is terribly wrong is the power being relied upon to do it (Ray Stedman).


Remember that grace and truth cannot finally be crucified. Remember that all the high things that make humanity beautiful cannot be forever laid in the dust, spattered with blood. And most of all, remember that He who rose from the dead, rose to pour out His Holy Spirit into human lives, and, by that Spirit, to make available to any individual all the fullness of Himself, twenty-four hours a day (Ray Stedman).


Legalism can also be described as false Christianity because that is essentially what it is. It uses Christian language and biblical terms. It sounds evangelical. It loves to use phrases like “evangelism,” “fundamentalism,” “biblical literalism,” and such. It sounds Christian, and looks Christian, but it is emphatically not true Christianity. It as a spurious fake, an imitation Christianity, an empty, hollow counterfeit of the real thing. It is a burdensome drag upon the spiritual life that creates a sense of bondage and guilt. It is a sickening, nauseating fraud in the eyes of others. God describes it in the Scriptures as a stench in his nostrils. That is what legality really is (Ray Stedman).


For many years, the resurrection of Jesus Christ has been the central certainty of my life, as it has for thousands and hundreds of thousands of Christians. To me the great value of Easter Sunday lies right here. Amid all the question marks of this questioning age in which we live, the resurrection of Jesus Christ is God’s great exclamation point. And if you are aware of the questions, the doubts, and uncertainties that surround us today, I think you will agree with me that we are very much in need of exclamation marks in this day. The belief of Christians this Easter Sunday morning is an island of faith in the midst of an ocean of doubt and uncertainty (Ray Stedman).


Exposition is preaching that derives its content from the Scripture directly, seeking to discover its divinely intended meaning, to observe its effect upon those who first received it, and to apply it to those who seek its guidance in the present. It consists of deep insight into and understanding of the thoughts of God, powerfully presented in direct personal application to contemporary needs and problems. It is definitely not a dreary, rambling, shallow verse-by verse commentary, as many imagine. Nor is it a dry-as-dust presentation of academic biblical truth, but a vigorous, captivating analysis of reality, flowing from the mind of Christ by means of the Spirit and the preacher into the daily lives and circumstances of twentieth century people (Ray C. Stedman).


Unbeknownst to the people of Moses’ day (it was a ‘mystery’), marriage was designed by God from the beginning to be a picture or parable of the relationship between Christ and the church. Back when God was planning what marriage would be like, He planned it for this great purpose: it would give a beautiful earthly picture of the relationship that would someday come about between Christ and His church. This was not known to people for many generations, and that is why Paul can call it a ‘mystery.’ But now in the New Testament age Paul reveals this mystery, and it is amazing. This means that when Paul wanted to tell the Ephesians about marriage, he did not just hunt around for a helpful analogy and suddenly think that “Christ and the church” might be a good teaching illustration. No, it was much more fundamental than that: Paul saw that when God designed the original marriage, He already had Christ and the church in mind. This is one of God’s great purposes in marriage: to picture the relationship between Christ and His redeemed people forever! (George Knight)


[Jesus] did not consider the political dominance of the Romans to be any infringement of the sovereignty of God. It is not the rule of foreigners over the nation, but the rule of all ungodly powers in the inner life of men, that the sovereignty of God aims at removing (Gustaf Dalman).


We study doctrine until we worship (Abner Chou).


Our constitution was made only for a moral and religious people. It is wholly inadequate to the government of any other (John Adams).


The general principles upon which the Fathers achieved independence were the general principles of Christianity (John Adams).


We are justified by faith alone, as the Reformers taught, but not by a faith that is alone. To truly receive the words of God is to intentionally, through a joyous faith in our crucified and resurrected Lord and active reliance upon His Spirit, obey them. Consider that if exposure to God’s word in the spoken gospel and the written Scriptures doesn’t soon change your behavior (even if slower than you might hope), if the transformation of your inner person does not extend to your outer life, you may well be wandering in the dream of those who never knew Him (Greg Morse).


Sometimes pastors become pastures. The sheep feed in them and trample them, but so not follow them (Mark Absher).


A follow of Jesus Christ who seeks to lead like Jesus must be willing to be treated like Jesus. Some will follow. Others will throw stones (C. Gene Wilkes).


Find someone who knows more than you and learn from that person. And find someone who needs what you know and teach that person. Every Christian is a student; every Christian is a teacher (Grady Jolly).


The most pathetic person in the world is someone who has sight, but has no vision (Helen Keller).


After all the high-blown theories are offered about why Jesus wept, we finally come down to the simple truth: Jesus wept because He cared. When He heard the sobs of the sisters of Lazarus, Jesus simply could not hold back His own tears. I doubt He tried. And the Holy Spirit, along with the New Testament writers, seems proud of that (Lynn Anderson).


The church needs elders who “live in the Word,” not merely “study the Bible.” Our best passions can be stirred by a shepherd who lives under the Cross with blood in his tracks and a Bible in his hands (Lynn Anderson).


Oh, how God’s church needs leaders who model persistent prayer, whose prayers glow with fervency, and who authentically believe God hears and cares. And how our spirits soar when leaders model vibrant praise and worship to God, who are unashamed to throw back their heads open their mouths, and let their adoration – even their tears – flow in free and authentic worship (Lynn Anderson).


No one can enter the kingdom without the invitation of God, and no man can remain outside of it but by his own deliberate choice. Man cannot save himself; but he can damn himself (T.W. Manson).


1. There are many who profess to know Christ who are mistaken. What evidences do you have that you have been given life by God?
2. What does it mean for a person to love God? In what ways do you see true biblical love toward God demonstrated in your life? Do you see true biblical love toward God in the lives of your wife and each of your children?
3. How does your wife feel about your commitment to pastoring?
4. Why do you believe God wants you in the pastorate?
5. Closely examine each of the Bible’s qualifications for pastors and deacons (1 Tim. 3; Titus 1:5-9; Acts 6:1-6; 1 Pet. 5:1-4). Which are you strongest qualities? With which requirements do you have the most trouble? Why do you believe these areas of difficulty do not presently disqualify you from ministering? (Note the phrase “must be” in 1 Tim. 3:2.)
6. A pastor is charged by God to preach to the church and to shepherd the people in a more individual way. Which aspect of the ministry appeals to you the most? What are some specific ways you could be helped to develop your skills in either of these areas?
7. What are your methods for involving yourself in the lives of your people as their shepherd and overseer of their souls?
8. What activities characterize your evangelistic interest? What is your approach to personal evangelism? corporate evangelism?
9. What is your approach to counseling? How do you handle your counseling load?
10. What are your specific and regular practices regarding the spiritual disciplines (e.g., personal prayer, Bible study, meditation, stewardship, learning, etc.)?
11. How would you describe a successful pastor? How would you describe a successful church?
12. How is the pastor held accountable? What relationships in your life currently provide accountability for responsible attitudes and behavior, both personally and as pastor?
13. Who are your favorite Christian writers, commentators, theologians, etc.? Why? What books have you read in the past year?
14. Describe an instance when you made attempts to reform the church in some significant area. What were the results? What did it cost you personally?
15. Describe your leadership style. What have been some weaknesses? Strengths?
16. When you have met with opposition, has it been mostly related to your style of leadership, your personality, your beliefs, or something else?
17. According to your observations, what doctrines need special emphasis in our day?
18. What is true biblical repentance?
19. What is true biblical faith?
20. Explain justification by faith. What is the difference between the Catholic view of justification and the biblical view?
21. Please explain your view of sanctification. What are the various means God uses to sanctify the believer?
22. Can a person have Christ as his Savior without submitting to Him as Lord? Explain.
23. What is your position on the inerrancy of Scripture?
24. Explain the biblical term “baptism of the Spirit.” When does this baptism occur?
25. What are your views on baptism by water?
26. How does the Bible relate the sovereignty of God to salvation?
27. What does the Bible teach about the extent of man’s depravity?
28. What does Christ’s atonement accomplish?
29. What does the Bible teach about the perseverance and preservation of believers?
30. What is the proper use of the Old Testament law?
31. How do you articulate your present view of end-time or eschatological issues?
32. Do you believe that Jesus Christ was born of a virgin? What is the significance of your belief?
33. What is your interpretation of the biblical teaching on Hell?
34. Do you believe that the events described in Genesis 1-11 are factual or symbolic?
35. What does the Bible teach concerning spiritual gifts? Please delineate your views about prophecy and speaking in tongues.
36. What is your view of divorce and remarriage? How strictly will you follow this view in practice?
37. What is your view of the phrase, “The bishop [pastor] then must be…the husband of one wife” (1 Tim. 3:2)?
38. What are your requirements for performing a marriage ceremony?
39. Please explain your views on church discipline. Relate any personal experience.
40. How would you handle a case of scandal or immorality by a church member?
41. What is your view on abortion?
42. Many children who appear to be converted at an early age show no evidence of knowing Christ later. How do you handle children when they come to you for counsel concerning conversion? What is your advice to parents?
43. What is a useful plan for receiving new members into the church? What are prerequisites?
44. What are your views on styles of church music?
45. Who should direct the worship of the church? Why? Which methods of leading corporate worship are appropriate? Which are inappropriate?
46. What does the Bible teach is the purpose of the church’s weekly gathering?
47. What are your views regarding raising money for various projects within the church? Should the church solicit those outside the church?
48. What are your convictions about the local church and debt?
49. What does the Bible teach about women in pastoral ministry?
50. What does the Bible teach about how churches should make decisions?
51. How should a pastor and his church relate to other churches locally and (if denominational) to the larger body? Do you feel comfortable cooperating with other denominations? Do you draw any lines?
52. What are the biblical responsibilities of elders? Are there any distinctions between elders, pastors, and overseers? If applicable, what distinctions exist between staff and non-staff pastors?
53. What are the biblical responsibilities of deacons? How are deacons and elders to relate?
54. What emphasis do you give to the leadership of fathers with their families, especially in terms of family worship? Do you personally engage in family worship with your wife and children?
55. What is your missionary vision for the church? How are you currently demonstrating missionary interest and involvement? (Jim Elliff and Don Whitney)


Church leaders who have been committed to seeing the church reformed according to God’s Word down through the ages have had a common method: read the Word, preach the Word, pray the Word, sing the Word, see the Word (in the ordinances). Often referred to by theologians as the elements of corporate worship, these five basics are essential to the corporate life, health, and holiness of any local church (Mark Dever and Paul Alexander).


Far from inviting us to play around as much as possible and as close to the fire as we can without getting burned, [the Bible] makes it clear that a sincere Christian will cultivate the highest moral and sexual purity, as essential to his or her worship of God [1 Thes. 4:3-5; Eph. 5:3-5] (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


What we need most are seeker-sensitive lives, not seeker-sensitive services (Mark Dever and Paul Alexander).


For the majority of adult Christians, singleness is not a gift but a trial (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


What are the practical benefits of having more than one elder?

1. It balances pastoral weakness.

2. It diffuses congregational criticism.

3. It adds pastoral wisdom.

4. It indigenizes leadership.

5. It enables corrective discipline.

6. It defuses “us vs. him” (Mark Dever and Paul Alexander).


God also places a man in a relationship with a woman so that she will grow spiritually within the safe confines of his loving care. This is masculine love, as defined by God: to nurture and to protect. Men are to show a protective and nurturing concern for women that equals (or surpasses) their instinctive concern for their own bodies. As Christian men do this, the women in their lives will shine with the spiritual beauty that is precious to God (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


Biblical humility is not some self-induced groveling or hang-dog attitude. Biblical humility is seeing ourselves as we are. Humility is a response to beholding the holiness of God (G.A. Pritchard).


A woman’s heart bears God’s image differently than a man’s does, but no less accurately. Indeed, with only the masculine qualities that men exhibit, God’s image is not completely displayed in this world. Men must realize that those feminine qualities that seem so baffling (and to a certain extent always will) are things of beauty and honor that manifest aspects of the image of God. Far from wishing that a woman’s perspective could just be ignored or somehow fixed, Christian men should look upon women with wonder and joy – indeed, with the very delight once expressed by Adam in the Garden! (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


Leaders have an agenda, look for ways to incorporate others into their plans, and have a high need for control in life. Balanced with graciousness, leaders become a treasure because they make things happen, create organization out of chaos, and motivate people to action (Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller).


Should we “go as far as we can” without getting into trouble? That is how unbelieving people think (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


No one person can be the source of your contentment. Contentment comes only from God, and the sooner we start seeking it in Him, the better off we will be (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


If you cannot be contented in singleness, you will not be contented in marriage… No one person can be the source of your contentment. Contentment comes only from God, and the sooner we start seeking it in Him, the better off we will be (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


In our wealthy and materialistic society, Christians often tend to trivialize covetousness, but Paul calls it idolatry, and lists it as one of a number of sins that are bringing the wrath of God “upon the sons of disobedience” (Colossians 3:5-6). Concerning the love (or coveting) of money, Paul told Timothy that it was a “root of all kinds of evil” (1 Timothy 6:10). John was speaking of covetousness when he wrote, “Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him” (1 John 2:15). “Do not be deceived,” Paul wrote to the church at Corinth. No covetous person “will inherit the kingdom of God” (1 Corinthians 6:9-10) (Jim Elliff and Daryl Wingerd).


We must never forget the thief of the cross (Lk. 23:39-43). He is often used as an encouraging example of a deathbed conversion, but certainly much more is involved. Instead of seizing his last opportunity to be saved, perhaps it was his first opportunity! And think of the courage needed to confess Christ openly before that derisive mob. However one interprets the passage, one thing is clear: where there is life, there is hope. We never know what transpires between the soul and God as that soul is about to enter eternity (Warren Wiersbe and David Wiersbe).


It’s important to understand that anger is not good as a response to problems. It usually builds walls, increases tension, and contributes to distance in relationships. But we do believe that anger is good for identifying problems. Once you understand anger, you’ll be able to use it to your advantage to point out problems in life. Then you must move into another mode or plan to solve those problems (Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller).


A man may have a charismatic personality; he may be a gifted administrator and a silken orator; he may be armed with an impressive program; he may even have the people skills of a politician and the empathic listening skills of a counselor; but he will starve the sheep if he cannot feed the people of God on the Word of God. Programs and personalities are dispensable. But without food, sheep die. Feeding the flock is therefore the pastor’s first priority. “Feed my lambs” (John 21:15, ESV) (Mark Dever and Paul Alexander).


Two of the most godly and disarming ways to display humility are accountability and correctability (Mark Dever and Paul Alexander).


Many men think of the call to give themselves for a woman solely in terms of her protection. They say, “I would defend her if there was trouble. If someone attacked her I would step up for her protection.” But they fail to realize that when a woman enters a dating relationship, she mainly needs to be protected from the sins of the very man to whom she is offering her heart. The enemy that men need to stand up to is the one who lives within themselves: the one who is selfish, insensitive, and uncommitted. It is when that man is put to death that the woman will be safe and will be blessed in the relationship (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


Deacons…serve to care for the physical and financial needs of the church, and they do so in a way that heals divisions, brings unity under the Word, and supports the leadership of the elders. Without this practical service of the deacons, the elders will not be freed to devote themselves to praying and serving the Word to the people. Elders need deacons to serve practically, and deacons need elders to lead spiritually (Mark Dever and Paul Alexander).


Too many singles think that life starts only with marriage. But singles must cultivate a purposeful life of Christian growth and service. You are not stuck in a holding pattern, just waiting to land at the great airport of life. The habits you develop as a single will carry over into marriage, and you will probably pass them on to your children. Remember, it is death – not a wedding – that removes every vestige of sin and presents us glorious before God. As singles, we must cultivate godly habits and the fruit of the Spirit that enables us to lead holy and effective lives (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


It cannot be emphasized enough that once a congregation votes a man in as an elder, they should cooperate with and submit to his leadership joyfully. Without a sincere intention and effort to cooperate with the leadership of the church, there is no point in electing elders to lead the congregation. Unless the elders are leading in an unbiblical or sinful way, uncooperative members are simply a bane to the local church and should seek fellowship elsewhere if their presence becomes divisive (Mark Dever and Paul Alexander).


Sin is the rejection of God’s authority. Sin is based on a denial of God’s goodness and truth. Sin involves idolatry (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


Five Causes of Anger: 1. Physical Pain. 2. Blocked Goals. 3. Violated Rights. 4. Unfairness. 5. Unmet Expectations (Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller).


God’s Word is His supernatural power for accomplishing His supernatural work. That’s why our eloquence, innovations, and programs are so much less important than we think; that’s why we as pastors must give ourselves to preaching, not programs; and that’s why we need to be teaching our congregations to value God’s Word over programs. Preaching the content and intent of God’s Word is what unleashes the power of God on the people of God, because God’s power for building His people is in His Word, particularly as we find it in the Gospel (Rom. 1:16). God’s Word builds His church. So preaching His Gospel is primary (Mark Dever and Paul Alexander).


Music is a subset of our corporate worship, and corporate worship is a subset of our total-life worship (Mark Dever and Paul Alexander).


A Christian man who takes the lead in sexual purity, and who tells the woman that her heart means more to him than her body, and her purity is more valuable to him than his own pleasure, liberates her from a cruel bondage and gives her a blessing that words can hardly describe (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


What does the Bible say about dating? Nothing. And everything! Our challenge is to think biblically about an activity that isn’t in the Bible (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


Intimacy should therefore follow commitment; commitment is the cup into which intimacy is safely poured and from which it is wholesomely enjoyed (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


In the right setting – that is marriage – sex is a wonderful gift from God. Sex is given for our good. But God gave sex to be the servant of love and never the slave of lust. God intends for love to express itself in the commitment of marriage, and only then for intimacy to unite us in the joys of sexual love (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


The practice of comprehensive forgiveness overcomes our love of being right, our actual enjoyment and treasuring of our sense of being wronged… The constant practice of forgiveness leaves no room for self-righteousness. Frustrated condemnation of others and treasuring of old wrongs are not part of the artillery of God, but the slithering, slimy, deadly creatures of the Prince of Darkness (John Miller and Barbara Miller Juliani).


Old Testament narratives are not just stories about people who lived in Old Testament times. They are first and foremost stories about what God did to and through those people. In contrast to human narratives, the Bible is composed especially of divine narratives. God is the hero of the story – if it is in the Bible (Gordon Fee and Douglas Stuart)


Factors taken into consideration [when evaluating the potential for missionary support]:

1. The strategic nature of the work.

2. Relationship to “our” church.

3. Amount of money already in hand.

4. Competency (Mark Dever and Paul Alexander).


If what we’re doing on Sunday mornings is corporate worship, then it makes sense to give deliberate preference to congregational singing – singing that involves the active participation of the whole congregation (Mark Dever and Paul Alexander).


One of the reasons why so many fall into sexual sin – bringing guilt into the relationship and short-circuiting its emotional and spiritual growth – is that they place themselves in tempting situations. This is simply foolish, and Christian men and women who are realistic about sexual temptation will not put themselves in a position to fall (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


According to the Bible’s perspective, if you are dating you are not just holding hands, you are holding hearts. What you do with your own heart, and what you do with another’s, is a matter of great importance (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


Commitment, intimacy, and interdependence – these are the building blocks by which a healthy dating relationship grows toward marriage. They start out small – a first date does not and normally should not involve a great deal of commitment, intimacy, or interdependence – but as a couple desires to grow toward marriage, they should pray for these qualities to grow in their relationship and they should give of themselves along these lines. This is, by the way, the best way to develop a healthy marriage. A strong marriage draws from the relationship that was developed before the wedding, a relationship that grew according to the architectural plans of God’s design in creation (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


In today’s society, intimacy means practically nothing more than having sex. Couples meet and immediately begin enjoying sexual intercourse, committing either to immoral hedonism or to the idea that sex will serve as the foundation for love. This goes a long way toward explaining why so many marriages, built on no stronger foundation than sexual thrills, end in divorce soon after the flames of passion have died down (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


Compatibility is not the key to marriage… It is our conviction, based on experience in ministry and God’s Word, that two Christians who share an attraction, who are committed in faith to God through Christ, and who are determined to obey the Bible’s teachings will be able to love each other in marriage (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


I initially examined Christianity in order to write a book making a mockery of it… After extensive research, however, I discovered that Christianity is not a religion of men and women working their way to God through “good works.” Nor is it obedience to a pattern of religious ritual. Rather, it is a relationship with a living God through His Son Jesus Christ. To my amazement, I was confronted with a person, not a religion. Here was a person who made staggering claims about Himself, along with profound claims on my life. Jesus was so different from what I had expected. Other religious leaders put their teachings out in front. Jesus put Himself out in front. Others would ask, “How are you responding to my teachings?” Jesus asked, “How are you related to Me?” (Josh McDowell and Bart Larson).


Second Corinthians 6:14-15 warns [Christians], “Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness? What accord has Christ with Belial? Or what portion does a believer share with an unbeliever?” This, like all of God’s other commands, is not a cruel barrier to our happiness, but a loving restriction that preserves us for God’s blessing. The blessings that we are hoping for come from God alone. Therefore, we must start with obedience to His Word. Only a relationship in which both partners are Christians can possibly result in the kind of love that only God can give (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


If God is my portion, if God is the true source of my joy, and if it is God who will fulfill me, then I am free to be a companion instead of a consumer. That is, because of what I receive from God I can give to another person instead of always taking; I can minister rather than manipulate because of the fulfillment I get from God (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


Sexual sin will damage and often ruin a promising relationship. It stops the development of emotional, intellectual, and spiritual intimacy (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


A woman needs to know about a man’s background and character before he has worked his way into her heart (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


Lying is stating something, either written, oral, or with other signals, with the intent to mislead (Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller).


The ordinances are the dramatic presentations of the Gospel. They are the moving pictures that represent the spiritual realities of the Gospel, written and directed by Jesus Himself… The ordinances, then, are where we see the Gospel enacted, and our participation in it dramatized. They are where the word of God’s promise is spoken to us in tangible form – we touch and taste the bread and wine; we feel the waters of baptism. They are means of grace instituted by Jesus that God uses to assure His people of the trustworthiness of His Gospel and the reality of our participation in it (Mark Dever and Paul Alexander).


Instead of considering those women who are most physically attractive, and then trying to restrain your flesh so as to give at least some thought to Christian character, you ought first to focus on those women who give evidence of fearing the Lord. Feminine wiles are deceiving, says God’s Word, and men easily fall prey to this very thing. Therefore, a wise Christian man will protect himself from the entrapment of beauty and will desire above all else a godly, growing Christian woman (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


If a member shows prolonged negligence in gathering with God’s people, how can he say he loves them? And if he doesn’t love them, how can he say he loves God (cf. 1 John 4:20-21)? (Mark Dever and Paul Alexander).


God’s Word has always been His chosen instrument to create, convict, convert, and conform His people (Mark Dever and Paul Alexander).


The authority of the pastor is derived and declarative. In other words, the pastor has authority only insofar as what he is saying is faithful to the Message of the One who has sent him (Mark Dever and Paul Alexander).


How are you to avoid falling into sexual sin? The answer is this: while you struggle with unfulfilled sexual desires, the last thing you should do is to toy with them. Human sexuality operates on a positive-feedback system. Each stimulus is designed not to leave you satisfied but to increase your desire until you finally join in sexual intercourse (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


God values them with a great love, and men who think the treatment of a Christian woman’s heart will not affect their own relationship with God are seriously mistaken. She is Daddy’s little girl! (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


Sin needs darkness to grow – it needs isolation disguised as “privacy,” and prideful self-sufficiency disguised as “strength.” Once these conditions prevail, sin is watered with the acid of shame, which then makes darkness appear more attractive to the sinner than light (Mark Dever and Paul Alexander).


Broadly speaking, baptism tends the front door of the church, while the Lord’s Supper tends the back door. Properly administered baptism (i.e., baptism of believers only upon a credible profession of faith) helps to ensure that only genuine believers are admitted into the membership of the church. Properly administered communion (i.e., communion given only to members in good standing of evangelical churches) helps to ensure that those who are under church discipline for unrepented sin do not scandalize the church or eat and drink judgment to themselves by partaking of the Lord’s Supper (1 Cor. 11:29) (Mark Dever and Paul Alexander).


A Christian woman is to seek a man who is: 1. Regular at church… A believing man who often cannot make time to faithfully attend and to be a contributing member of a church is not a likely candidate for the obligations and challenges of marriage. 2. A man of the Word of God, a man of prayer, and a man who delights in worship. 3. A man after God’s own heart. 4. [A possessor of] specific character traits [such as] industry… integrity…self-control…[and] kindness (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


[Church] discipline has three primary purposes. The first is to restore fallen Christians to usefulness to God and fellowship with His church (see Matt. 18:12-14; 2 Cor. 2:5-11; 7:8-10; Gal. 6:1-2; Jas. 5:19-20). The second is to guard and preserve the honor of God (see Rom. 2:24; 1 Cor. 10:31). And the third purpose is to protect the purity of the church (see Rom. 16:17; 1 Cor. 5:6; 1 Tim. 5:19-20) (Wayne Grudem and Dennis Rainey).


The longer we serve in ministry, the more we see that pretty much everyone is envying everyone else. It is really pitiful. None of us has the circumstances we really want, and the circumstances we have always provide us with challenges. What a shame it is when we allow such envy and resentment to hinder the Christian fellowship that ought to be one of our chief blessings in this life (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


A first date should be safe, relating and fun. It should minimize awkward, compromising scenes. We think it best if the first date not be a place at night, both to create a more casual setting and to minimize sexual tension. The goal is to get to know each other better and to begin the process of sharing that, Lord willing, may lead to a closer relationship down the road (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


It is commonly accepted among men today that the great danger is to get married too early. The thought of marriage is approached with fear and trepidation, with the threat of what the man will lose mainly in mind. But in the view of Genesis 2 – and in our experience in ministering to singles – the greater danger is what will happen to the man if he doesn’t marry. It is not good for a single man to develop selfish and otherwise sinful habits. It is not good for a man to grow older without the sanctifying influences of a wife and children. It is not good for a man to battle with sexual frustrations. (The same things might be said about a woman, too, but the Bible is specifically talking here about the man.) What is good for a man is to seek a relationship that will blossom into marriage – the sooner in adult life, the better (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


Counsel, prayer and accountability – these are three vital tools for healthy, wholesome dating (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


The devil’s attack against God begins with the greatest of God’s creatures, the one who has dominion over all else, the one who bears God’s image and holds the dearest place in God’s heart. It says quite a lot that what the devil hated most in God’s perfect world was the man and the woman in their relationship with God (Richard and Sharon Phillips).


Use working definitions [with your children]:

1. Obedience is doing what someone says, right away, without being reminded.

2. Honor is treating people as special, doing more than what’s expected, and having a good attitude.

3. Perseverance is hanging in there even after you feel like quitting.

4. Attentiveness is showing people you love them by looking at them when they say their words.

5. Patience is waiting with a happy heart.

6. Self-discipline is putting off present rewards for future benefits.

7. Gratefulness is being thankful for the things I have instead of grumbling about the things I don’t have (Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller).